It’s the last day of the year and I am filled with bittersweet emotions. It was a year of many ups and downs. I don’t know if the latter outnumbered the former or the other way round but then again, that’s what this year left me feeling. It left me with this lingering feeling of ‘I don’t know’, a certain uneasiness about the uncertainty but also a bit of excitement about the future.
The year gave me way too many lessons. Its not like I’ve figured out everything yet. But guess what, it’s alright. You don’t need to have everything figured out. You don’t need to know if you stand on the blacks or the whites; you can just squat on the greys for a while more. The world will give you nothing but advice – some well meaning, some not very. Some that you want to hear, some that you don’t but need to. You’ll feel like shutting yourself up and at the same time, pouring your heart out. It’s alright. Breathe. It’s going to be okay. No one knows how but everyone knows it will.
Dilemmas will play havoc inside your head. Suddenly, everyone around you is keeping it together but you’re falling apart. You can’t figure out right from wrong and even your instincts give you the ditch. You want to let go and you fear the future regret of not holding on. It’s alright. It’s still going to be okay. There will be a time in life when you just stare blank not knowing where you’re heading and who’s going to hold your hand tomorrow to keep you from falling, or even worse, while you’re falling. And that’s also alright. At the right moment, everything will make sense.
If there’s anything I’ve learnt this year, it’s this: nothing is constant. Not the people, not the misery and definitely not the bonds you share. But what can be constant, are faith and patience. Somewhere, somehow, at the right time, the faith in the higher force, in your inner self, in your God, in your teacher, will guide you through. It may not instantly put the pieces of the puzzle back together but it will give you the strength to get through the chaos.
We need to be trusting in the workings of this universe. Nod your head when people tell you that everything happens for a reason. But take your time for you to accept that knowing the reason will take a while. People often tell you that if things don’t happen the way you want them to, it’s good. There’s a better plan in store for you. It is hard to swallow this bittersweet truth but drink all the water you need, to make it go down. It will be a lot like the pungent medicinal cure to your ailment called sadness.
In the end, what you do, is your choice. It may not always be what you were advised to do. Choose what makes you happy as long as you aren’t unethical and hurting others. Listen to your conscience and your voice of reason. Act and speak when you’re calm. Hope for the best and it will all work out.
As we embark on another journey this new year, let’s remember that the goodness in us will always shine brighter than the darkness that envelops us. Let’s remind ourselves that people change, sometimes even for the better, and we need to embrace that. But most importantly, we need to know that miracles happen everyday and you’re not an exception to being blessed with one!
Ink and Paper 