We’ve known each other since the time I learnt the alphabet. He’s heard me sing my rhymes animatedly and I’ve seen him zoom around the classroom with a Hot Wheel car. He’s poked fun at me combing my Barbie’s blonde curls and I’ve teased him about his WWF cards and Pokemon tazos. But before you go all ‘awwww’ and assume that this is the beginning to a cute love story and bring out the popcorn to hear it all, I’m going to burst your bubble. He isn’t my boyfriend but my guy best friend. And before your narrow mind brushes it off as being the same thing, stop. Guy best friends exist. They belong to a species different from boyfriends. And their life span is always longer than your romantic relationship.
Our strong bond can well be a competition for fevicol and our wide smiles can make us ambassadors for toothpaste companies. Pouts, rolling eyes and funny faces – our pictures express our craziness. But don’t let the arm around my shoulder fool you into assuming that we are dating. Stop yourself from sharing a Whatsapp profile picture of him and me in your kitty-party group to cook up weird images of our ‘intimacy’.
He and I may have different tastes but we unite for seasoning and popcorn, even if it’s a sob story that we need to endure. We’d rather crack ourselves up by giggling at the snoring man next to us or at the dramatic mother-in-law in the movie than give up on food. So if you’ve already snooped around and felt that two tickets for a girl and boy meant a romantic date, then it’s time you stopped taking those Mills & Boons novels so seriously.
He probably visits me more often than my girl best friends. And I’ve dragged him along to the beach for a long walk quite frequently. We’ve robbed each other of some sound sleep just to have deep yet stupid conversations in the middle of the night – oscillating from the purpose of life to why blue pencils are cooler than orange – for hours together. But if you feel like Sherlock after spotting me with the same guy – time and again – and harbour the itch to tell my folks, you ought to go ahead. No doubt you may have convinced them to get into detective mode, but believe me, they know their daughter better than that.
He’s shopped with me in the skirts section – despite being victim to your judgmental gaze – while I’ve helped him pick out a tie for his first job. He’s teared up before me and I’ve been a klutz in front of him. There’s nothing ‘taboo’ between us and yet, we’ve kept our boundaries. He knows when I want some ‘alone’ time and I know when he’s having a boys night out. We know our hugs are magical and we know that it stops there. I’ve slammed the phone down on him and he’s hung up on me. We’ve played the ‘won’t talk to you ever again’ game once too often to even give a fig about it. And we both are quite possessive about each other in front of our boyfriends, girlfriends, guy friends, girl friends, family and well, even the pixies in fairyland. We can go all out ballistic if anyone breathes one negative word cause we love each other. Oh, this love doesn’t give you that tingly feeling in the tummy or make your knees weak. It just keeps you warm and happy.
But hold back that thought to quickly translate a hashtag, a profile picture, a long caption or a text message into a perfect sign indicating our marriage. We’d happily invite you for our respective D-Days and trust me, you’ll get your katori of extra gulab jamun. We’ve been taught good touch and bad touch and we won’t hesitate to use pepper spray if things went wrong. I’ll tread carefully enough to ‘give out the right message’ and he’ll be open to say if he’s falling in love.
And finally, we may get hitched if we don’t find anyone else 20 years down the line. At that moment, don’t come with that annoying smirk on your face to say, ‘I told you so.’ cause love doesn’t bloom cause you feel your thoughts played cupid. It happens cause friendship grew despite you.
PS: If you’re putting your judgmental hat on just to assume that this post is based on a personal experience, then dunk the hat in the bin. 🙂